When I teach on homosexuality, I’m often asked about how a believer can bring up the topic of homosexuality with a friend or family member who identifies as gay or lesbian. I’m always puzzled by this question. It assumes we’re supposed to go through life and try to figure out non-believers’ sins and bring them up in conversation so they’ll consider stopping the prohibited behavior. But we can’t expect non-Christians to act like Christians. As my pastor often says, “Don’t put family rules on those outside the family.”
Our hope for homosexuals is not heterosexuality, but holiness. We’re not trying to make them straight, but lead them straight to Jesus. In almost every case where I’ve seen a man or woman with same-sex attraction abandon a life fulfilling homosexual desires, it was because they first committed their life to Christ. Then, with the Holy Spirit in their heart, they were transformed from the inside out and began to live obediently to the standard of Scripture.
That’s why my advice to believers is not to focus on behavior modification of non-Christians. That’s only a band aid. If you really want to say something about your convictions that is also relevant to them, tell them about Jesus Christ. Homosexuals, like any other non-Christian, need to hear the offer to be pardoned from their crimes against God. Only then can there be true healing.
And that's really the central lie here, isn't it?
Posted by: Phillip A | March 03, 2015 at 07:32 AM
Phillip, a lie is intentionally trying to deceive. That's not my purpose here. I agree I could have clarified that I'm referring to those particular homosexual men and women who are not believers. Of course there are Christians who have same-sex attraction, but I'm not referring to them in this case. I'm simply trying to explain to believers that the outcome we hope for regarding all non-believers (including homosexuals) is that they come to know Jesus.
Posted by: Alan Shlemon | March 03, 2015 at 09:43 AM
“Don’t put family rules on those outside the family.”
But why not? Don't the same rules apply to all?
Are you hoping we get them saved before they read the Bible or ask us those explosive family/marriage/gender defining questions?
Or have the Bells (Rob & Kristen) rung at your church too?
Posted by: Scott Richardson | March 03, 2015 at 07:00 PM
@Scott: Why don't the rules apply outside the family?
Since when have the 'rules' saved anyone?
Posted by: Nathan Schultz | March 04, 2015 at 10:21 PM
Wow.. tough crowd. haha
I thought this was a very well thought out and written blog. The point is we need to preach the Gospel to seek to save the lost, not "change" the homosexual. I read ya loud and clear. Only then can God make them new creations.
Posted by: Jared | March 14, 2015 at 12:42 PM